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Ellen DeGeneres is finally speaking up about how reports of a toxic workplace environment on her show affected her mental health. In her most recent Netflix special, Ellen DeGeneres: For Your Approval, the comedian reflects on her career, revealing that public accusations took a toll on her.
DeGeneres, whose talk show The Ellen DeGeneres Show aired for 19 seasons between 2003 and 2022, addressed the impact of the workplace allegations in her new special, which premiered on Netflix on Tuesday, September 24.
The charges were originally made public in July 2020 by BuzzFeed News, which accused her show of creating a toxic work environment. Although DeGeneres publicly apologized during the final season of her show, she has yet to adequately explain how deeply the charges upset her.
“I’m happy not being a boss, a brand, or a billboard, just a person,” DeGeneres said on stage, revealing how she’s dealt with the experience. “Just a multifaceted person with different feelings and emotions, and I can be happy and sad and compassionate or frustrated.”
The comedian did not hesitate to acknowledge the challenges that she faced during the controversy. “I have OCD and ADD. I’m honest. I’m generous. I’m sensitive and thoughtful,” she stated in her special. “But I’m tough, and I’m impatient, and I’m demanding. I’m direct. I’m a strong woman.”
The revelations brought cheers from the audience, which replied with a standing ovation. DeGeneres visibly moved, mouthed thank you and said she was proud of who she’s become.
Reflecting on her career, DeGeneres observed that being in the public spotlight is often fraught with scrutiny. She stated that being a public figure leaves you subject to everyone’s interpretation, and she is sure you’ve heard the phrase, “What other people think of her is none of her business.” Because people will say anything, and you have no control over it. But you understand the truth, and that is all that matters.
DeGeneres talked about how comedy makes her more sensitive to public opinion. She said if they like you, you’re in; if not, you’re out. She has spent her entire life trying to make people happy, and she is way too concerned with what others think of her.
She described the accusations of mean-spiritedness as very distressing. She went on to say that the thought of anyone thinking she was mean devastated her and consumed her for a long time.
However, as she has gotten older, DeGeneres claims she has gained perspective. She stated that after a lifetime of caring, she simply cannot anymore. So she doesn’t. But if she is honest, she has a choice between being remembered as mean or beloved. She chose that.
Ellen DeGeneres: For Your Approval is now streaming on Netflix, providing fans with a candid look at DeGeneres’ personal reflections following the emotional end of her talk show era.